Open letter to all moms who are often judged
People often judge us by what they see. Especially, us, first time mommas. The “veterans” as what they call themselves, they are the ones who have raised their own kids and/or grandkids. They will normally judge us based on their own beliefs and experiences. And then, there are these “naive” ones. They are the group of people who do not have kids of their own but still criticize us based on what they think is “right”.
So, this goes to all:
-Stay at home moms who are judged by “not doing anything”
-Working moms who are judged by leaving their baby over their careers.
-Breastfeeding mamas who are judged (and sometimes shamed) by the “conservatives”
-Non-breastfeeding moms judged by “breastfeeding advocates”
-OC moms judged by being too keen
-Moms who “spoil” their babies by showing them too much affection.
-Moms of sick kids who are to blame because of their “negligence”. (It’s as if people would expect our babies to be immortal)
-Moms who let their babies watch TiVo
-And moms who don’t
-Mamas who have specific options on what to feed their babies.
-Moms who enroll their kids to school at an early age
-Moms who enroll their kids at an older age.
-Mums who ask for “me” time
-Moms who do chores rather than play with their babies
-Moms who prefer to play with their babies and make the chores wait.
-Moms who’ve had their kids at an early age
-And mums who’ve had theirs later
-Mommas who workout after giving birth
-Mammas who gained a lot of weight
-Moms who haven’t potty train their babies YET
-Mums who give dummies
-Moms who buy lots of clothes and toys for their little ones
-And mums who don’t
These are only to name a few. People will judge us no matter how hard we try to do what we think is right and best for our babies. But as the saying goes, you cannot please everybody. You are your own self, and your baby is unique just as you are. Follow what makes you and your baby happy and comfortable. As long as you meet your baby’s physiological and emotional needs, then do what you think best suits you and your baby. Your kid, your rules.
Often, mommas who get judged have higher chances to develop postpartum depression (if not already). So, instead of stressing over what other people say and think, cast your undivided attention over to your little ones.
You are not a bad mom. You are, in fact, one beautiful, capable, amazing and wonderful momma.